Better Day Today

Things went better today. I felt better when I woke up-it's amazing what a quiet time can do! I had energy and actually wanted to get things accomplished. Since I was feeling so adventurous, I decided to take the kids (all 3 of them!) to Wal-Mart. I have been needing to go for several days, but when we ran out of diapers for Madeline this morning, I knew it was time to go. It went really well. Max was so funny! Every time I put something in the shopping cart, which he was sitting in, he would yell "Yay Mommy! You did it! Good job!" He is such a hoot! The volume intensified when it was something that he really liked, like cereal or yogurt. Overall, it went really well. I definitely will not be taking all of them when I have tons of shopping to do, but today was a smaller one. Although, as usual, I walked out of there with much more than I had planned on buying. Don't tell Jason!

I feel like I am getting the hang of things. Jason is at a late meeting tonight, so I was on my own with the kiddos. It went fine. I even bathed all 3 of them-which is interesting. I got them all to bed by 8:30 (MIRACLE!!) so I actually have time to sit down and blog. :-)

I have received emails from several people who are also adoptive parents. All of them have been so encouraging. What a blessing. They shared their struggles-some of them identical to ours. It's amazing how much guilt you can put onto yourself because you think that your feelings are so wrong. What a refreshing reminder that other people out there have gone through exactly the same thing as us and have made it through it. Thank you to all of you who took the time to email me today, or left a comment on the blog. I am so grateful that you did so. It really truly encouraged me.

One last thing before I sign off. We got Max's appointments for Scottish Rite Hospital. This is the children's hospital where we will be taking Max to have evaluations/corrections made on his hands and legs. Our first appointment is November 20, in which his hands will be evaluated by a team of doctors. Unfortunately, his appointment for his prosthetic leg isn't until December 8. I had really been hoping for an earlier appointment for that. His prosthetic leg is at least 1 inch shorter than his other leg because he is growing out of it. So I am concerned for him to continue to walk around on it for another couple of months. Hopefully once we have the evaluation, the doctors will be able to move quickly. Pray for that please..

Next time I post, I promise to include pictures!!!!

At Long Last...

Please accept my apologies for how long it has taken me to sit down to write an update. It has been crazy here since we returned! We got back to Arlington on Saturday, October 18. We felt a mix of emotions as we arrived-relief, excitement, joy, anxiousness...Our journey to adopt Max was coming to an end, but an entirely new journey was about to begin. It took us some time to realize that. We are now in the process of becoming a family. We have been praying for Max for so long, and have yearned to be with him so strongly-it was so exciting to finally be united with him. But our bonding as a family will take time.

It was a hard week last week, between being exhausted from the jet lag, the kids being exhausted from the jet lag, Abby being sick and then Madeline having some issues...but we are finally getting into a good routine here. The house is not staying quite as neat as I would like, but I am realizing that I am putting really high expectations on myself. I simply cannot keep up with everything right now. The most important thing is to teach Max how much we love him and for him to learn to trust us and love us.

We have seen some really positive and encouraging signs over the past week that he is bonding to us. We visited Jason's office last week and he didn't try to get down out of my arms the entire time. He was more quiet and reserved than normal. This is good! This means that he felt uncertain, yet felt safe in my arms. He asks for Jason a lot when he is at work. He also whined for me one day when I had left to go run an errand. Very exciting! This is the only time we are happy to report that one of our kids is whining!!! We have had lots and lots of play time as a family. Lots of wrestling (big surprise!), reading together, cuddling like a baby and tons of play time outside. He loves to be held and cuddled and is really learning to let us do it for longer periods of time. Sometimes it is a struggle for us when we are trying to cuddle him and he is pushing us away, but we know that he is not used to it, and needs to be taught that is is fun and special.

Now for the hard part- I have been struggling a bit. I have felt overwhelmed with the transition from 2 to 3 kids. Especially with the change of a boy. I have felt down for the past couple of days for various reasons. I have not been getting enough sleep, I haven't been doing my quiet time, and there are certain things that I am dealing with emotionally. This has been unexpected and has been difficult. Please pray for me. Pray that I would not be hard on myself or expect perfection right now. Pray that I would be patient with the kiddos as they adjust to each other. Pray for our bonding with Max. We have loved Max from afar for nearly 2 years. We would do anything for him, just as we would the girls. But the emotions are different right now, which kills me. But as I finally spent some time with God this morning, I realized something. Just as Max needs time to learn to trust us and love us and attach to us, we need the same thing. He is our son, but it will take some time to develop depth to that relationship. Please pray for us. We know we'll get there-but we are finally realizing that our true, deep love will not develop overnight.

I will say that he is doing exceptionally well. He is adjusting so well. He is having a lot of fun here-he loves playing with all of his toys, with his sisters, with us, with the dogs, and outside as well. He has responded well to our discipline. He is eating well, sleeping well and really learning English quickly. We could not have hoped for his adjustment to have been any better! I am so proud of him, for how resilient he is proving to be. Overall,we are very pleased with how he is doing. We are anxious to begin introducing him to the outside world, but we continue to be very careful about his exposure to others. I do feel that he is beginning to grasp that this is his home and that we are his family. But we are still going to be cautious. Better to be over-cautious now then realize later on that we jumped the gun to soon.

I promise to begin blogging again on a consistent basis. It may not happen every single day, but it will be multiple times a week. The blog will be about the whole family, not just about Max anymore. I am thrilled to finally be at that place!!

Last Post from China- U.S.A. Here We Come!!!!

We are up late as usual, having waited until the last minute to start packing. Although, I guess last minute would truly constitute waiting until tomorrow morning. So perhaps we are ahead of the game!

We had an interesting experience at the U.S. Consulate today for the oath ceremony (this is also where we got Max's passport with his U.S. visa and all of the documents necessary for him to enter the U.S.). We had a harrowing taxi ride that believe it or not, was actually worse than the last bad one. At one point, I truly thought we were going to collide with another taxi. I squeezed the kids so tight I thought they might pop. I will be so glad to have them back in carseats! Our driver apparently thought he was Tom Cruise from Top Gun and that he had the need for speed. He took one corner so fast that we all shifted so hard that it seemed that all 5 of us were sitting on top of each other. I actually started begging God to get us there safely. We were sending up major flare prayers in the backseat, begging that Mr. Tom Cruise in the front would get us there without bodily injury. We made it, praise God!

And that's where things got interesting. We waited for several minutes in the lobby of the building for our guide. After about 3-5 minutes of waiting, we started to get a little worried. Then a Chinese woman approached us saying, "Consulate?" We said yes, that we were going to the consulate. She then proceeded to tell us in very broken english that it was closed. For a second, I actually felt my heart drop to the bottom of my stomach. Had we misheard our guide? She was late, which was very unusual, then this woman was telling us that the consulate was closed. We didn't see any other Westerners, so we started to get worried. Jason went to ask someone else, then decided that we would head up to the consulate ourselves, to see what the situation was. We were pretty confident that we were there at the right time-even without our guide being there. As we rode 4 different escalators to the 5th floor, I decided that I wasn't leaving without a fight. We are leaving the country tomorrow afternoon, and we can't leave without his passport.

Long story short-everything was okay! I don't know what the woman on the first floor was thinking. As we were waiting to enter the consulate, we saw another family from our adoption agency. We immediately felt better. They helped us get our papers (with the help of their former guide from a previous adoption). Leila, our guide finally showed up. She had had to run back to the hotel to get another family at the last minute because their appointment time had been changed. We had the oath ceremony, where we promised never to abandon or hurt Max and then it was done. It was pretty cool. I wish we could have had cameras in there, because I would have loved to take pictures. There were tons of families there, adopting children from all over China. It was a beautiful picture of sacrificial love and determination. I am sure that all of those families shed just as many tears as we did (if not more) and spent countless hours doing paperwork, praying, preparing everything and waiting. Very special.

We did some last minute shopping and then headed back to the apartment for our last dinner here in Guangzhou. I can't believe our 17 day trip is almost at a close. I simply cannot wait to get home! We will be spending the night in L.A. with my brother Friday night, then we fly into DFW on Saturday at 5:15 on American Airlines flight # 2444. We'd love to see you guys at the airport, if you live in the DFW area. We want to include all of you in the celebration of welcoming Max to Texas. He is sure to put on a show.

One last thing before I close my last post from China. Please pray for Abby as she seems to have picked up whatever it is that I have. Pray for her as we endure the 12 hour flight to L.A. We are hoping that her ears will not be affected. Please also pray for safe travel all the way home, and for Max as well, that he would handle the coming changes well.

Love to all of you from Guangzhou, China!!!

The promised long entry....

We had planned yesterday to spend the day at a safari that is about 45 minutes away from here. That changed when I woke up. The night before I had been feeling kind of crummy. But crummy was not nearly strong enough a word for how I felt when I woke up. I've had a sore throat for almost the entire time we've been in country, but on Monday night, whatever had been brewing erupted. I have never had a cold come on this fast or this hard. Thank goodness we didn't have adoption stuff to do that day, because all I did was rest. At one point, I was on the couch, with my hand on my head, and Max came over and struck the exact same pose! He even had the same forlorn look on his face!



Jason was such a trooper, handling the kiddos all by himself so that I could sleep. He even took them to the playground by himself so that it would be quieter for me to sleep. Another adoptive parent here, who I had been emailing with before our trips, happened to have some antibiotics with her, that she had no need for. So I spent last night calling the doctor to find out if I could take them. I am not the kind of person who runs to the doctor to get prescriptions when I feel bad. I only went to the doctor once this past year-but I did not want to chance that this illness develop. We head out in 48 hours, and I do not want to be stuck on a plane for 12 hours feeling like my ears are about to pop. All that to say, Jason got the antibiotics from my friend today (thanks Kristi!!!!) and I started them this evening. I pray that whatever I have will improve before we leave China on Friday. Even more important, I pray that the kids don't get sick!!! I have been very careful about trying not to give them germs.


So enough about me and onto the ones that really matter-the kiddos. But before I share some fun stories, I just want to take a second and say thank you to all of you who took the time to email me or post comments on our blog after we posted about Max and our concerns about his bonding with us. We felt so much love from all of you and so much support and encouragement. We are so grateful to all of you and know that our family is being bathed in prayer right now. We thank God for you. We know how fortunate we are to have friends like all of you. We know too, that God will give us the wisdom and the patience that we need in order to guide Max through this transition into our family. He has already blessed us by opening our eyes so quickly. I have heard from others that they have seen families that allowed their children to give their love away to anyone and everyone, and because of it, are still dealing with the ramifications of no parent attachment. So we thank God that we realized so quickly that things weren't as rosy as they seemed. Thank you to all of you for your advice and kind words about our skills as parents. It means the world to us!!


So this time I will truly share about the kids. Because we didn't go to the safari yesterday, we had lots of fun play time around the apartment. Man we are thankful that we are staying here. I don't know how we would have managed yesterday or today if we had been in a hotel room. Jason and I had some special time with Max while the girls were still sleeping. We woke him up a little early so that he wouldn't nap quite as long-he's been stalling at night when it's bedtime, so we thought we would try a little experiment. Anyway, we brought him into our bedroom to have some one on one play time. Now let me just preface this with the cold hard truth. Jason is 31 years old-on the outside. In his heart, lingers the spirit of a 13 year old boy (and I have the pictures to prove it!). Sometimes this is fun (like yesterday), not so much when it's time to put the kids down and he's still throwing them around on the couch. But yesterday was precious! There is a window right behind our bed that just happens to have a deep enough ledge that a 3 and 1/2 year old boy and a 31 year old man could stand up on it and jump off onto the bed. How fortuitous for our family because we just happen to have a 3 and 1/2 year old boy and a 31 year old man who love jumping off of things onto the bed. Jason and Max had an absolute blast. I served as recorder of the jumping session-also to have documentation of what exactly happened to give to the doctors at the emergency room-which is where I was sure we would end up later. (We didn't)

I loved seeing Max's face light up! It was so sweet to see such sheer joy on his face. Jason is such an absolutely wonderful father and our kids are lucky to have him. The girls love to wrestle and that is completely due to Jason. Max loves it too and has fit into our wrestling matches quite perfectly.

We also had fun with arts and craft time. The best part was playing with some foam playdough that I bought right before we left. It began innocently enough at the table, with all of us molding our craft into different shapes and sharing nicely. It ended with each craft being shaped into perfect balls in order to peg someone else with precise aim. Unfortunately I have no pictures of the incident as I was one of the participants in the throwing. The kids loved it! Most of our family members know that Jason and I have an insane affinity for throwing things, both to each other, and at each other. It's inexplicable how two people with the same weird passion met up and actually married. We have spent many a night laughing hysterically after having spent that previous hour dodging objects that were hurled with great speed at our bodies. In the past, we have used bean bags, rolled up paper, socks, wash rags, baby dolls, stuffed animals, dirty diapers, etc.. Notice how the list changed-after we had kids the objects that we found in reach were quite different. Please don't judge us.

At dinner that night, Max did something adorable. We have been holding hands and praying at all of our meals (just like we've always done at home). It has taken some time, but finally Max knows that we will do that before we eat. He has even started whining when we all sit down, if we don't pray fast enough. Well last night, he upped his involvement. As Jason prayed, we suddenly heard Max talking as well. It was not understandable, but he was trying to mimic Jason. It was so sweet. He even said amen at the end. He is so smart!!!!

Today we spent the whole day in our apartment. It was another day for me to rest and try to sleep and fight off whatever it is that I have. We had some great play time with the kids and Jason and Max ran down to the grocery store to get some things for dinner. We have been cooking many of our meals here, since we have the kitchen. When we decided to stay here, at the apartment, one justification was that we could save money on food by cooking. Some of the meals have turned out really well, and one has gone straight into the trash can (that would be the smoked sausage we made last night). Jason said he had a bad feeling about it as soon as he smelled it when it came out of the package. We raided the fridge for leftovers and were relieved that we had not served the sausage to some guests the other night. We have had pan-grilled chicken and potatoes, beef stir-fry (the beef had to be diced into miniscule pieces so that we could chew it-it must have been a cut more suited for stew!), spaghetti, chicken nuggets, ramen noodles, peanut butter sandwiches and fish fillets (actually came pretty well!). We have enjoyed the challenges of cooking and feel that it has been a mostly positive experience (except for the sausage). Abby has also decided that there are certain things she likes better here, because they are chinese. For instance, she informed us last week that would she eat the broccoli because "Chinese broccoli is much better than Texas broccoli." She has also said this about rice, pineapple, fried eggs and some types of bread. However, the infamous smoked sausage did not make the cut. Texas sausage is still better. Yee-haw.

Tomorrow we do the very last step of the adoption work, we go to the U.S. Consulate for Max's oath ceremony. His visa was approved today, so we'll pick it up tomorrow and then he will be sworn in as an American citizen. What a momentous occassion. He will actually become a U.S. citizen when we land at LAX. I cannot believe that our trip is almost done. I am so excited to be returning home-to introduce Max to all of you, who played such a big part in getting us to him.

Sorry!

Sorry for the non-blog tonight. I spent a lot time on the phone with a doctor back home about antibiotics. I'm not feeling well, so I am being proactive before we fly home in 3 short days. Praise God that an "internet friend" here has antibiotics and will be passing them off to me tomorrow. Pray for a speedy recovery on my part.

We will post an extra long blog tomorrow with great pics from today!

One of those Days....

Today was not the best day we've had here. It started off by me (Virginia) taking Max to a required medical check up. There was a huge group of people in front of us, so I stood in line for 45 minutes, holding Max the entire time. My arms wanted to fall off when it was over. That wasn't the worst part. Seeing the doctor was. I will share more details when we return home, but suffice it to say, my mama bear instincts were kicking in high gear today.

Jason and I have also come to the full realization that we have a long road ahead of us when it comes to full bonding and attachment with Max. He is so sweet and so extroverted-we love that about him. But we are also finally realizing that it is making it harder for him to bond specifically to us. He loves attention from other people-and when he gets it, he is not interested in us. Today, as I was walking with some other families to the medical check up, he reached for another mom's hand and she took it. After a minute he tried to shake free of my hand. I know that he isn't trying to hurt me, but it does hurt a bit. We have been working so hard with him, and felt that we were making progress, but we are definitely seeing signs that he is not as far along as we had hoped. That is why I held him for the entire wait in line. Any time I put him down to rest my back, he was trying to run into our guide's arms or was wrapping his arms around someone else's leg. He gives his love freely to anyone.

We spoke with someone from our agency before we left about this very thing. Children being adopted respond in one of 2 ways: Complete rejection of the parents or total acceptance of the parents and everybody else as well. Max seems able to indiscrimanately bond with anyone. We have come to the conclusion that because of his great personality, it will actually prove harder for him to bond/attach with us. It is vital that he do so because it will affect everything about his relationships for the rest of his life. We are disappointed but hopeful. We know we will need to seriously consider everything that we do when we return to the U.S., evaluating carefully the ramifications for him. He is the life of the group when we are around anyone-and so loveable. We don't want to feel like the bad guy when we tell people- "Please don't pick him up, don't hold his hand, etc." I hate the thought of that. But it seems we will have to be dilligent about it for some time.

Please pray for us, that God would grant us wisdom to know how to deal with this. I promise you that I prefer this to the alternative-complete rejection of us. But it is hard for us to hear him call other people Mama and Baba. He loves being with us, I have no doubt about that. But he loves being with lots of other people as well. We need for him to learn that we are the most important people in his life and that we are a family.

Please also be understanding and patient with us when we return, know that we will be dealing with this for some time. I don't know what exactly it will look like, but things will not be like we had originally imagined (nothing has yet!!).

Fun With Friends

The church we visited today.

Our first family picture!

Max and Maddy! Max is holding a picture of the two of them,

taken earlier in the year.

We went to church today with several other families who are also adopting. One family happened to be the family who is adopting Max's best buddy from Harmony House, Maddy. Her family arrived one day after we got Max, to pick up Maddy. We had really wanted to see them and spend some time with them . The funny thing is, last week when we were registering the adoption paperwork, we looked over and saw Maddy. Her parents told us today that Dan, the father, was videotaping the room where all the adoptive parents were waiting with their children, and he thought he had spotted Max through his camcorder (he had seen numerous pictures of Max and Maddy together, just as we had). He told his wife, she said, "No way." But as they looked again, they realized it was indeed Max. So we got to meet earlier than expected. It was sweet to see Max and Maddy see each other again.

So today we met up with them to go to a church that has a bilingual service. We didn't make it through the entire service, the kids were just too restless. We walked outside to let the kids run around a bit, then decided to walk back to the hotel where we had all met. I walked back in to tell Dan and his wife that we were leaving. Lo and behold, they had decided to leave early as well. So we spent time together at their hotel, just talking and watching the kids play together. We had lunch together, then made plans to get together that evening at our apartment. They arrived safely and we had a wonderful evening together.

Max and Maddy have a special affection for each other. They both came from the same orphanage in Shantou City, where they were both chosen to go to Harmony House for more specialized care. They were in the first group of children to go to Harmony House when it opened. So it was very special that they were united with their families within a day of each other. We plan to keep in touch with Maddy's family so that Max can keep that connection alive.
Dan and Jennifer (Maddy's parents) showed us the funniest thing. The hotel where they are staying gives one to each family who is adopting. It is a Barbie doll who is holding a little chinese baby. It is a hoot!

Special Barbie, adopting a chinese baby. Too bad for Max

that his mommy doesn't look like that!

I have also included some pictures of Max and Maddy playing together. They are so incredibly cute. Maddy's parents and I have decided that we will set up an arranged marriage between Max and Maddy. They are perfect for each other! They are so cute together, and man would they have beautiful kids!

By the way, please excuse the randomness of the pictures. I have been having a lot of problems moving pictures to the spot I actually want them since I have been blogging here. There is no way to cut and paste them the way I would prefer to, so that is why they are all together at the top, with one below. Blog Spot is beating me at this game!

Energy

Hi all!

This is going to be a shorter post tonight. We are tired and going to try to get to bed before 11pm tonight. I'll let you know tomorrow if we actually accomplished it tonight.

Had an uneventful day. No teeth broke, no dishwashers spilled bubbles out the front (long story from last week!), no death rides, I mean crazy taxi rides. Abby and I met up with our guide to fill out all the paperwork for Max's visa. I took her so that Jason would have an easier time with younger 2. We are still a little overwhelmed when one of us is on our own with all 3. I have told Jason repeatedly that he can never go back to work and leave me by myself with all 3 of them!! :-) Just kidding. We are getting used to the change. They are really adjusting well, and we are so glad we brought the girls. Max wouldn't be having nearly as much fun if they weren't here (the following video is proof of that!).

Heard some funny things today. I will share them and close with that. We are going to go to church tomorrow. I'm excited/curious about that experience!

*Abby has been calling Max macaroni since about the second day that we got him. Today she was calling him that and suddenly he said "Maca-jei-jei." Jei-Jei means big sister and that is what Max calls Abby. It was so funny!

*At dinner this evening, Madeline spilled something on the table and said "Oh Fudge!" She has learned that from me. I say it often when I drop something or stub my toe or something. But it was the first time she had ever said it. It was precious.

*While we were eating dinner, Abby said she didn't want to eat her broccoli. She then informed us that she thought she would eat it because it was chinese broccoli, which meant it was better. We'll have to use that trick at home, tell her that all her veggies are chinese, so that she will eat them.

*We were all dancing together in the living room to our favorite family song (Life is a Highway by Rascal Flats). At the end we told the kids to say bye-bye to the camera. One of the girls must have said chau-chau (Argentinean good-bye) because suddenly Max started saying chau-chau as well. He repeats so much!

Jason's Perspective

I'm sure most of you have been drinking deep of the sweet waters of Virginia's perspective throughout our entire journey here in the Far East, but today I wanted to pull back the curtains to give you a glimpse through the window of my experience. Our entire journey has been a tapestry of harsh experiences woven seemless with breath-taking joy in a once-in-a-lifetime voyage through China. Today is a case in point.

The day began innocently enough with Maddy waking up first, a few moments after dawn's first light. Soon after, Abby and Max joined her in casting off their slumber. Somehow today they woke up with a steroid-induced type of energy and were all but literally bouncing off the walls. After a superb (and more importantly free) breakfast buffet, we returned to the room to begin the day in earnest. My first task was to go to the bank to get some more RMB from the ATM machine. The task seemed simple enough, and all to harmless, yet somehow I returned from this menial task with a broken tooth and no money (that's the harsh experience part of the tapestry I was talking about).

Oh how I desire to have an incredible story of throwing down with a Chinese guy on the street to save some old lady from getting mugged. Oh how I wish I could say, "You should have seen the other guy," but alas, my faith does not allow me to express such dishonesty. The sad truth is that it was just a finicky ATM machine and a tooth that apparently decided it was time to jump out with the flavorless gum I had just spit into the garbage. Sad, eh?

Our entire trip has been like this. The things that should be insurmountable obstacles are traversed as if they were fluffy pillows on the bed, and things that should be as easy to overcome as walking over a cheerio on the ground become Mount Everest. Maybe this is just the Father's way of reminding us that He alone gives and takes away.

Just when my simple mind concluded that today would just be "one of those days," I was reminded of how good I have it. I couldn't help but sneak away periodically from the inexhaustible thirst of the kids for playtime just to marvel at God's creation of my three kids. Sure there were times when there was kicking, screaming, and I heard shouts of "Abby did it," or "Max hit me," or !%$%!$!@! (that's my version of whatever Max was screaming), yet at the same time I witnessed an incomprehensible tenderness that only the Father could create. Abby seemed so mature today. She would run up to Max in moments of deep emotion and embrace him with all the might her precious little arms could muster. She would even steal away from movie time and play time to go dedicate herself to her higher learning of ECC homework. I'm totally serious! She has a desk in her room, and she begs us to go do homework. I've attached a video to prove it.

Well, I know I've been longwinded enough, so I'll call it a night for me. I hope to go jogging around Guangzhou tomorrow morning, so pray for me. I can't soldify the veracity of this claim, but I believe that the Chinese have some sort of point total for hitting pedestrians, and I think there is a triple point score for hitting Americans. I'm probably an easy target.

Fun in Guangzhou

We met our guide today to do some shopping. We hadn't really had the chance to get around Guangzhou, so we were excited to see some more of it today. We took a taxi over to a hotel to meet Leila (our guide). It was an interesting taxi ride, to say the least. Honestly, I don't think I will ever be able to describe it in full detail. However, I will share some of the highlights (notice I didn't say favorite parts).

*The driver swerving repeatedly around stationary vehicles, narrowly missing pedestrians each time
*The driver hocking up the biggest loogie in history, rolling down the window, and spitting it out (I was praying the whole time that it would in fact make it out the window and not fly to the back of the car into Abby's face)
*Max seriously vomiting because of the aforementioned swerving
*Madeline hitting her head on the bars separating us from the driver because of the aformentioned swerving


When we arrived at the hotel I felt like the little girl from the movie The Pacifier, who kissed the pavement, saying "Land, land." after surviving a drive by her teenage sister. I truly considered doing it. However, I was still trying to help Max puke into the barf bag (one of many we "borrowed" from our last plane trip. All in all, we were happy to have arrived!!!
We loved getting to go to some shops. They are created just for tourists like us, who are ready to blow some serious dough. We got some beautiful clothes. We'll post pictures when we get have a chance to put them on. We also had a really great experience with some Chinese women. Jason went into a shop by himself while I kept the kiddos outside. There was a little park area that had benches and sidewalks. We walked over there to wait. A very nice, friendly woman was there with her adorable little dog. Madeline absolutely adores animals of all kinds so she was in heaven. We had a lot of fun playing with the little dog and communicating a bit through our guide. The women were very taken with the kids and the kids were very taken with the dog. I was so sad we had not brought our camera because I would have loved to have been able to record some of our precious time with the women. At one point, little miss independent Madeline started walking off into the distance, with her new doggy friend obediently following her. The dog's owner and I were chasing after them, yelling in our different languages, neither of us getting any results. It was a hoot!! About that time, Jason had shown up, so he was able to help.


Jason and I got some down time today (YAY!!!!!!!) because we put all 3 kids down for a nap. We have had almost no time together because of all the craziness, so it was really nice. We seem to be settling into a good routine here. It has made things easier. Tonight Max will sleep in a bed by himself, rather than with us. We thought we would try it out. He slept in his bed for his nap and did great, so we're hopeful!

We went to the playground this afternoon. The kids absolutely love it and are always bummed when it is time to leave. We are so grateful for such a great place for the kids to play. There were a ton of families there today, it was neat.

I have included some pictures and videos of various things. Enjoy!

Newspaper Announcement

I received a copy of the announcement that was put into the newspapers for Max's parents, at some point after he had been abandoned. The local authorities advertise information about abandoned babies in the newspaper to give the families one more chance to reclaim their children.

For some reason, reading it really broke my heart. I was aware of some of the details of Max's beginning, but reading the announcement really struck a chord. I had given some thought to Max's parents at various times. I have wondered what they were feeling as his mother went into labor, probably not expecting him to be born the way that he was. I wonder how she felt when she saw him. There are many different things that she could have been thinking. I cannot assume that he was abandoned because he wasn't wanted (because of this physical deformities). I wonder if perhaps his parents hoped that he would have a better chance at survival by letting him go, hoping that he would be adopted. I know that for some parents, that is the most merciful thing that they can do.

Here is the announcement:

Fu Gu, male, was born on February 22, 2005, was found abandoned on the field of Qiamenzai, Hengshan, Raogu County, Chaoyang district, Shantou City. He has deformend right foot and hands. He was a new-born baby at that time. He was found with thirty yuan RMB and a bottle. He is placed in Shantou City Welfare Institute.

I cried as I read that. His parents, left him with a bottle and the equivalent of a little more than $4. It broke my heart for so many different reasons. I will never truly understand his parents situation or all that they were experiencing. But in God's greatness, He had a plan for Max.

We were out tonight and saw a beggar on the street with severely disfigured limbs. As I looked at him, I thought to myself, "That could have been Max." Maybe some view his abandonment as an act of cruelty, but for the first time, I can view it as an act of compassion. His life is forever changed because he is now part of our family. I thank God for teaching me that. Max was fearfully and wonderfully made-and I believe he was created especially for us. I also believe that God has something extraordinary for him, because He has moved major mountains to get him to us.

Max is Officially Ours!!!

We officially adopted Max today!!!! We went to the registration building here in Guangzhou, and had a family picture taken, turned in our documents, paid our fees, and had 2 interviews to establish that we understood Max's special needs, would never hurt or abandon him. We also had to explain why we wanted to adopt him. I could have talked all morning about that!! There are so many reasons why we want him, but the most basic reason is that God led us to this-which of course we didn't get into. Would have been a hard conversation to translate. I still find myself amazed at all that God has done. I remember when we first began talking about him, whether we should try to adopt him, not knowing how hard it was to actually adopt a specific child. But here we are, a testimony of the power of the Almighty.

The time at the registration building was a little crazy. There were TONS of families there with their little children to be adopted. Madeline was a bit tired and overwhelmed by all the people. She had a little meltdown. I was hoping that the officials wouldn't change their minds about us adopting Max! We got to see Max's sweet friend from Harmony House, Maddie. She and Max came from the same orphanage 2 years ago and were some of the first orphans to come to Harmony House. She is precious and we were so happy for them to see each other again. I think that they are very special to each other. We got to meet her parents and hope to maintain contact for Max and Maddie's sake.

We had a slow afternoon. We just stayed here at the apartment, so that the kids could rest. Every moment spent together is just more bonding as a family. I am so thankful that we don't have appointments every day. We just sit around and play, interact, talk and try to teach Max as many words as possible. He amazes us with what he is picking up already. Here are some of the words he has already learned:
Abby, Maddy, no, NO!!!, don't touch, potty (sometimes he says polly), wait wait wait (one of my biggest phrases), I love you, and the most important one of all- Diggums. He has learned the name of Madeline's special bunny. It was so precious today when he said it. He was looking at his picture of us that we sent to him this summer. Madeline was pointing to all of us, telling him our names and she always included Diggums. Then he stared saying it. For those of you who have heard Madeline say Diggums, she doesn't really say it, she kind of rolls her tongue around her mouth and pushes it in and out, making noise. Max did it, and it was hysterical. We laughed like crazy, so of course he did it again and again. We'll try to get it on video tomorrow.


We will be spending time with some friends tomorrow. They have 3 children, so we plan to go to the pool and the playground. They are Americans, living here in China. We are looking forward to that! I imagine that it will be Max's first time to swim.

Enjoy the videos! You can tell that Max loves to be on camera!! Hollywood, here we come!

Great Day

We had a great day today! That is saying a lot because we had a little scare with Abby last night. She woke up crying uncontrollably, incoherent, and unable to communicate with us numerous times last night. Her body temperature was also lower than normal. We finally called a doctor at about 1:30 am because we were so disturbed by what was happening. We weren't sure if what was happening was connected somehow to her vomiting all day Friday. The doctor assured us that everything was probably fine and we finally got to bed around 2 am. She slept better, but we are anticipating that it may continue. We believe she is having night terrors-brought on by the time change, tiredness, and the stress of all the changes.



All that to say, we were a little worried about today, but it was a fantastic day! We didn't have anything to do today, adoption-wise, so we just rested and played. There is a great playground here on the premises, the kids loved it. We will take our camera next time we go over there so that we can share in the fun. Max absolutely loved the slides. We are amazed at what he can do. He crawled up the slide-I was sure that he wouldn't be able to, but he proved me wrong. I expect that to happen often. :-) We also got to walk around a bit, not too far from where we are staying. It is very pretty here. Very tropical looking.



Tomorrow we go to begin the adoption proceedings for the Chinese authorities. Soon, Max will be legally ours. It is so exciting to be at this step. It still takes me aback that we are finally here, doing this. It has been such a long wait, it is almost surreal.



I have included some pictures of the kids playing. They have such a blast together. It is incredible how quickly they have all taken to each other, especially Abby and Max. She is so loving and motherly toward him (we knew that she would be) and he eats it up most of the time. Tonight after dinner, all 3 of them chased them each other around the apartment, screaming at the top of their lungs. It was so precious. They were laughing hysterically the entire time. So cute!




Madeline really enjoyed her chocolate milk! The kids love the glass top table. We hope it is all in one piece when we leave.

Abby giving Max some serious love.

Family Time

We are in Guangzhou and we are so happy to be here! We finally have our Internet connection so I have time to sit down and really write and share about the past few days.

What a whirlwind! So much has happened over the past few days. Our "gotcha day" was not what we had ever imagined in our minds or hearts, but it was still special. I am quickly learning that we cannot plan in our head how things should work out. I had already decided in my heart, before coming, that I would remain flexible about everything. It has made it easier for me to deal with the unexpected because of that. When Abby became ill, it changed everything. Our focus could no longer be just about Max. Our concern for Abby was just as strong as our desire to be with our son. But isn't that the balance we have to find as parents of multiple children? Jason and I were so proud of Abby. She was such a trooper. Despite feeling terrible, she still wanted to go. It was so difficult to see her so sick and know that I couldn't do anything to help her. Even more, the despair of being in a foreign country with my little girl so sick.

Meeting Max for the first time was incredible. We pulled up to Harmony House and he was outside waiting for us. Jason graciously allowed me to go to him first. He came running toward me yelling Mama...sweet words to my ears. I picked him up and just marveled that I was finally holding him. He quickly looked at his baba (daddy), his jei-jei (big sister) and mei-mei (little sister). He called to them as well and there were hugs all around. He was so adorable.
Once inside, we had a few minutes to just sit with him. Lily, who is the administrator of H.H. had set out fruit and drinks for us. We just sat for about 25 minutes, eating, staring and marveling at him. He was a little quiet, but asked for help often with his food. We then spent some time talking with Lily about things. She brought down his things, including a suitcase we had sent to him earlier in the year. When he saw his suitcase, he immediately grabbed it and headed for the front door to leave. It was the funniest thing! He knew that he was leaving! We had to slow him down because we weren't ready to leave yet. It did warm my heart that he was eager to leave with us, and that he wasn't scared of us. We brought gifts for him to give to all of his friends, so he passed those out. All of the kids enjoyed the little presents. The girls were playing alongside some of the other children. Madeline made herself right at home with the toys. It was very funny. She probably would have been happy to stay all day and play with the toys.

We didn't stay very long because of Abby. We had planned to stay until the afternoon, but instead we were eager to return to the hotel to make Abby more comfortable. We packed everything up and headed outside, with Max in the lead. While outside, he and his very special friend Maggie (who was picked up by her family the next day) sang multiple songs as the children and nannies waved goodbye. It reminded me of the scene from the Sound of Music when the von Trapp children serenaded the party guests before they went to bed. It was very funny.

We headed back to Beijing with two barf bags ready to be used-one for Abby and one for little Max who we had just learned got carsick. Lucky thing we had the bags because there was a point when both of them were vomiting at the same time. What a Kodak moment!! We made it back to our hotel and got settled in with our 3 children. Suddenly the room seemed much smaller!! I had to go to a grocery store soon after in order to look for some items to help Abby. It seemed so anti-climatic to leave soon after returning with Max, but I am quickly learning that this trip is not going to be normal (more on that later).

We left Beijing the next day (on Saturday) with 3 healthy children. By the end of the day Friday, Abby was eating and holding down everything. That was such a relief for us. There were times that Jason and I just laid down and prayed over Abby. It was so scary to see her so pale and lethargic. I deal pretty well with the girls when they get sick, I am not a freak-out kind of parent, but this was different. We praised God when she started to improve. Now she is completely back to normal and we are so thankful!

We arrived in Guangzhou on Saturday evening. We were so anxious to get down here, because of the fantastic living arrangements we have here. We are staying in a 3 bedroom apartment with a kitchen, dining room, living room, washer/dryer, and much more. It even has 2 bathrooms which is huge for us! It has so much space!!!! It is going to be a great place for us. It will make this trip so much easier and SO much more enjoyable. I get cabin fever quite easily, so having the extra space, and being able to unpack everything makes a big difference for me. There is a beautiful swimming pool, a huge playground and other things to do right here in the community where we are staying. It has been raining all day , so we haven't been able to enjoy any of the outdoor activities yet.

Our adjustment with Max will take time. We have been used to 2 little girls. We have always known that little boys are very different from little girls, but for the first time, we are truly experiencing that. Max has a lot of energy. He is quite stubborn, but so are Jason and I. The nannies at Harmony House really spoil the children, so Max is not used to hearing the word no. However, as I thought about that, I think I prefer that (being spoiled) to the alternative (being treated with such a stiff hand that his spirit was defeated). It has been a big change for him to have us. We are trying to let him explore, but at the same time, trying to create boundaries for him. It will take time for him to get used to us, and time for us to get used to the best way to deal with him. His personality is great-he is very, very happy and has a very contagious laugh. He already loves being with his sisters, it is so obvious. He is so smart! He is already understanding when we ask him to do things. He loves to help do things around the apartment. He likes to clean up (which I love) and he likes to help us do whatever we are doing. He is extremely independent which is great. He is so adept at using his hands just the way that they are, which is amazing. You will really see what I mean when you meet him and spend time with him. He has really learned how to do just about anything that we could do, even though he is missing his thumbs and his hands are bent in. I love that he is independent in doing stuff for himself, because I have no doubt that it will help him in the future. Both Jason and I feel a bit overwhelmed right now-but every parent does with a new baby. We are praying for wisdom and an uncanny understanding of Chinese.

I need to wrap this up, but before I do, I want to share some funny moments that have taken place.
*When we were in the car, driving from the airport to our apartment, Max, Abby and Jason were singing all kinds of songs. Max would sing some in English and some in Chinese. Sometimes we could figure out what he was saying, sometimes not. At one point he looked out the window, pointed to something and started talking. We asked our guide Leila what he had said and she said "He is not speaking Chinese." It was so funny. We cracked up for quite some time. Abby is still bringing it up.

*We went shopping at a grocery store this afternoon. Everything that could go wrong did. It was pouring rain, we couldn't get a taxi to the store, the kids were fussy at the store, all of China's 1.6 billion people were at the store at the same time as us, and we couldn't get a taxi to pick us up after our huge shopping trip (so we stood in the pouring rain with multiple shopping bags, 3 soaked kids, and a very patient guide).

*Max was trying to take off his shoe last night when it was time to get into jammies. He insisted that he do it by himself. He pulled so hard on his shoe that his entire prosthetic leg popped off. Jason, Max, Abby and I started laughing uncontrollably, while Madeline started screaming "Oh no! What happened Max leg???" She was so concerned! It was so funny and made us start laughing even harder. Jason then took Max's leg to another room and Madeline really freaked out. She started looking everywhere for it and was so upset that she couldn't find it. She kept telling him, "Max, where your leg go?"

*Max was talking to Abby and she said to him, "Max, I don't understand you because you speak Chinese and we speak Texas."

I have attached some picture and video. Enjoy! We will continue to post daily. Sorry for the 2 day wait. We lost our Internet connection on Friday night and didn't get set up until today with one. We are so appreciative of all of your prayers for us, especially with Abby. We thank God for you.

Fun with stickers!

Daddy time!


Abby resting gracefully on the plane, like Sleeping Beauty

At Last!!!

We are now officially a family of five! We made it to Harmony House this morning...I will do my best to describe the scene...I will give more detail later when I have more time to sit down and really share.

Max was coming out of the house as we were getting out of our car. When he saw me, he said Mama-and came running toward me. I could not believe it! You hear so many stories of rejection and in my heart, I was prepared for that. But it was not the case. He came running into my arms. Unbelievable. We will post video of that when we return home. We aren't able to post from the camcorder yet.

When Max's suitcase was brought downstairs he grabbed it ran straight to the front door. He was ready to leave! We still had things to do there with the staff, but he was ready to rock and roll! It was adorable to see him dragging his suitcase.

I will post more tomorrow when we get to Guangzhou. We are about to lose our internet connection so I wanted to get pics up..

Abby is feeling better. We are hopeful that whatever she had has worked its way through her system. She has some color in her face and is smiling. Good sign!!

I promise to post more detail when we arrive in Guangzhou tomorrow. Thank you all for your prayers for us, especially Abby. This day was nothing like we expected, but it was a family reunion for sure. Max is doing spectacular. He is responding so well to us. He is calling us Mama and Baba (mommy and daddy) and has learned his sisters' names as well. He is very strong-willed and VERY funny. It is so easy to make him laugh. His personality is amazing.

Love you guys!

We made it!

We are here in Beijing, China. We are so happy to have arrived safely. The girls were so exceptionally good on the plane. I was not sure what to expect with them, but they were such troopers! We experienced a couple of meltdowns due to fatigue, but we were able to quiet them down fairly quickly.

We arrived at 4:30 am Beijing time. All of our bags made it! Praise the Lord! I don't know how I would have replaced all the gifts we bought for everyone here. Everything is Texas related. We had a nice long nap in the morning, then met our guide after lunch (in which Abby looked around and announced loudly that she had just seen a Chinese girl) and went to the Forbidden City. It was amazing to see it in person. We were happy the girls had rested well and were up for going. I would have been sad to miss it. The funniest part was that little miss Madeline was a mini-celebrity. The Forbidden City was extremely crowded because it is a national holiday today, but most of the Chinese that were there were taking pictures of the girls, especially Madeline because of her blonde hair and blue eyes. It was so funny! The Chinese nationals wanted to take pictures with her-they were so sweet. Some of them allowed us to take pictures of them as well, I have included some of the pics here. I remember this reaction with my sister when we lived in South Korea. She had blue eyes and very light hair and was given much attention for it. By the time we left the Forbidden City, Madeline had passed out on Jason's shoulder...as you can see below.

Tomorrow we head to to Harmony House to get Max. I am a mix of emotions right now. I am so excited, but for the first time I am nervous. I have been so prepared for each step of this journey, knowing what paperwork had to be turned in when and what step would follow, but tomorrow we take a giant step of faith off of the cliff of the unknown. But as I work to be calm, I remind myself that God Almighty has brought us here and will carry us as we step off....I have no idea what to expect tomorrow (except that I will be crying!) but I am hopefuly that Max will respond well to us. We feel that he has received a lot of preparation for tomorrow. It almost feels surreal to be here. We have waited so long for this-and now it's actually happening. Wow! Pray for us as we go from a family of four to a family of five tomorrow!

I will post again tomorrow with pictures of our sweet boy!